Today is International Men’s Day.
We often discuss the difficulties that women face but not the struggles men face. Modern feminists antagonize the male gender and distract us from the more fundamental issue — gender equality. As society continues to generalize men’s behavior, I took this opportunity to understand some of the struggles men face in 2021. I asked a few of my male associates to tell me some of the difficulties that men face. Here’s what they said:
“We have a hard time getting social support for our emotional problems.”
It is easier for women to express their emotions and discuss their pain. Our issues are belittled. We are not trained to ask the right questions and, no one is willing to teach us. The pressure is real. Matthew, 34
“Everyone expects us to be macho or manly.”
They believe that we should know all the answers and handle anything that comes our way. It can be tiring and, our mental health is taking a hit. Jamal, 32
“We are not equipped with the vocabulary or skills to operate in this world.”
We prefer to keep quiet because we are known to say the wrong things at the wrong time. I support the fight against domestic violence but, it can be a touchy topic. If you don’t know how to speak out, you can be scolded quickly. Allister, 41
“There is an absence of the ‘exemplary’ male to lead us out of this funk.”
We see women uplifting women but, the men are scarce. It feels like the older generation has abandoned the mentorship of young men. We need guidance and solutions from male role models in society. If we have examples to learn from, we can do better. Kendell, 25
“We are guilty until proven innocent.”
Most women go for the bad guys yet, all men are bad. Women tend to group all men as the same. Until then, men have to constantly prove otherwise. This happens when applying for jobs. We are discriminated against where we live, how we look, or how we speak. It doesn’t matter if we are capable. Men are the fault for all the wrongs in the world. Nicholas, 30
“Men are more likely to commit suicide.”
More men suffer from depression than ever before because they feel like there is no one they can talk to about their feelings and emotions without being judged. It reinforces the talk of toxic masculinity. Christopher, 43
“We support feminism but, it’s difficult to have a voice.”
Men who speak out against rape culture and sexual assault by identifying themselves as feminists may experience persecution for doing so, which discourages other men from speaking up. Martin, 38
“I love my children, but mother knows best.”
Unless I bring the matter to court, the mother has guardianship over the children. I want to have a good relationship with them but, I am a man. I am less important and less trustworthy. Justin, 31
This can provide some sense of connection because most men face the same challenges; some obvious, and some fought secretly. Men, you are not alone. You can persevere through the struggles together.
To be a part of this healing, women should view men as partners with equal voice and equal humanity. Just like equal opportunity for any career path for women, men should have the same resources to deal with abusive relationships or being sexually assaulted.
